I know I’m on a journey. I was in a labyrinth this past Thursday, literally. A labyrinth by definition is a “complicated irregular network of passages or paths in which it is difficult to find one’s way.” You could say this journey that I’m on is in a labyrinth. We had an employee well being fair at work. I went to the fair to see what was being offered. There were long lines for facials, massages, mini make up sessions, but there was one item that had no line. There was no one waiting to go into the labyrinth.
Let me back up to the start of my day on Thursday. Those who know me, know I can be pretty superstitious. I was totally looking forward to the end of my week and Friday afternoon. Thinking about that while doing my makeup for work on Thursday, I noticed a small white moth that was fluttering around me. I thought for a moment it must be Mark. It didn’t really bother me but it kept flying around as if to tell me he was there. I finished getting ready and off to work I went. Fast forward to the well being fair.
As my friend Kim and I walked by the room with the labyrinth laid out inside, Chaplain Josh encouraged us to go in and walk it. We both said why not try it. So we sat in the chairs and listened as we were given instructions on what to do. First we had to find our focus of what we wanted to think about as we walked. I had absolutely no clue! I took off my shoes and as my feet hit the ground, heart came to mind. Why not? The center of the labyrinth seemed appropriate to focus on heart so I went with it.
As it took my first steps I knew I wasn’t alone. Kim was walking her own journey but I was walking mine with someone else next to me, Mark. I knew he was there guiding me through the twists and irregular turns that made me uncomfortable at times. I got to the center and asked in my head if he was the one who said heart and the answer was yes. My mind questioned why and once again I could feel Mark telling me to open my heart and move forward. I could hear his thoughts saying he brought me to this point but now my heart was to find its own way, without him. I could feel a tear roll down my cheek as I quickly wiped it away. I didn’t want Mark to go but I knew and he knew it was time. It was time for me to truly start on this next journey.
As I took my first step out of the center of the labyrinth and back on the maze to get back out, I was alone. Mark was no longer there to guide me. This journey and phase of life was one I was to discover on my own, in a way. I knew I had to keep my heart open to the possibilities and people life was about to bring my way and for the first time I knew I would not always be alone on that road. There would be new journeys and people to share it with, journeys of the heart. Those irregular twists and turns on the way back were no longer uncomfortable, but a way to grow and a way discover new things about myself. It was to find happiness and excitement in the unknown, to be able to find the good in every thing.
The walk to my car after work that day showed me a new friend. There wasn’t a moth but instead a butterfly. Friday morning and afternoon too, another butterfly. The labyrinth was the beginning of a new phase and I took those butterflies as signs. Maybe, just maybe, my snow globe is starting to crack so I can venture out and continue to see what life has in store.